Where Logic Meets Love

Dan Ariely's Take on Marriage

Monday, June 18, 2012

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Hi friends --

Hanging out on the beach this week, woohoo! And trying not to panic about the impending move. I'm not sure whether it's helpful to take a vacation in the midst of massive stress to help you relax, or not helpful because you make your vacation less fun by being stressed out. I guess I'll find out!

Anyway, I know it's been a few weeks since we've had a What Marriage Means to Me post, but I have an awesome one coming for you next week. In the meantime, I wanted to share this interview from the Happiness Project blog that caught my eye because of what Dan Ariely says right at the end:
Getting married was another thing that surprised me. Before Sumi (my wife) and I got married I was thinking that this is just a ceremony that we have to do for tradition and legal reasons and that it would not change how I feel about Sumi. But it did. Very quickly after the ceremony I felt more commitment, love and caring. Maybe it is cognitive dissonance (why did we spend so much time and money on this wedding? It must be that we really really love each other), maybe it is the social commitment of standing before a lot of people and making a promise, maybe it was the promises we made to each other – whatever it was – I did not expect it.
I thought it was a great perspective to add to the ongoing conversation here about marriage.

You can read the full interview here.


  1. I really like Dan Ariely. He's done some cool Ted talks.

    1. I don't really know much about it, but I will have to check him out on TED!

  2. Dan Ariely may say these things, but before during and after this interview he was having a massive intellectual and sexual affair with a woman other than his wife. It's no coincidence that his book at the time is on lying. I really dislike it when people represent one thing to the world that is in complete contradiction to their true way of living and being. Maybe he could talk instead about how marriage, even to an awesome woman, wasn't enough for him, and he wasn't satisfied, and thereby open a real dialogue that could help people.

    1. Hey Anonymous (from August 10, 2014 at 10:13 AM) , I hope you get the notification about my response.
      I believe that you wrote this because you really know. I would love to get your advice because now I am this other woman...

  3. @ Anonymous May 4, 2015 Let's connect. How are you the other woman?

  4. What a joke- this guy is a disgusting cheater. What a fake.


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